Monthly Archives: November 2008

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Ask the Sarkozy this time!

Indian News Channels: Breaking News! Chicken crossed the road! Tune into our special show about it at 9 pm tonight.

Nicolas Sarkozy: Ze cheeckeen? Where? Where? Perhaps my Carla would like eet!

Atal Bihari Vajpayee: The chicken *pause of 10 seconds* crossed *pause of 15 seconds* the road *pause of 20 seconds* because *indefinite pause*…

Arjun Singh: Now, all these privileged upper caste chickens won’t have monopoly over crossing the road. 49.5% of the road is reserved henceforth for the OBC/SC/ST chickens. (If we have our way, the upper caste chickens will soon be banned from crossing the roads altogether.)

The Supreme Court of India: Aye, aye, aye! But butter-y, cream-y chickens are not allowed to have a share in that 49.5%.

Yousuf Gilani: Let’s get back to our old whining. No compromise on Kashmir. The chicken question is secondary, you territory-grabbing Indians! And anyway, our chicken has already been outed from power.

The Taliban: It was a female chicken and without a burqa and a male relative. We will not answer the question but there is going to be a public stoning of that chicken.

John F. Kennedy: Ich bin ein Chickenliner.

Voltaire: I don’t agree with the chicken crossing the road but I will defend to death its right to cross it.

Sartre: Because it had found out that “Hell is other people” and hence, it was escaping. Now, shut up and let me kiss ma belle Simone.

Martin Luther King, Jr.: I have a dream. It is to see the chicken cross the road without being questioned.

Le Corbusier: It was checking out my beautiful little Chandigarh’s 90-degrees road planning.

William Wordsworth: It wanted to wander lonely as a cloud.

Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.

Pablo Neruda: To sing a song of despair.

Hamlet: To cross or not to cross is the real question.

Caesar: Et tu, chick?

Robert Frost: Because it wanted to cross The Road Less Travelled and to make all the difference.

Rudyard Kipling: If you can cross the unforgiving road/ With(in) sixty seconds’ worth of distance run/ Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it/ And – which is more – you’ll be a Chicken, my son!

Edgar Allan Poe: Ghastly, grim, and ancient chicken, wandering while crossing a road and more/…../Quoth the chicken, “Nevermore”.

Douglas Adams: 42.

Marvin, the Paranoid Android: Chickens! Don’t talk to me about chickens! You can loathe them or ignore them but you can’t like watching them cross the road.

Voldemort: Who the hell cares about a chicken, you foolish, filthy Muggle? Avada Kedavra!

Luna Lovegood: It was not a chicken. My Daddy told me that it was a Crumple-Horned Snorkack.

Grindelwald and the 17-year old Dumbledore: For the Greater Good.

Plato *copying the two wizards*: Yes, I put my bet on that too. For the Greater Good it is!

The Agnostic: The chicken, if that’s what it really was, crossed the road, if that’s what it really crossed – if it crossed at all – to uh… hmmm… I don’t know!

The Atheist: I don’t believe there ever was a chicken. I don’t even believe there ever was a road. Neither of them existed. This is a trap!

The Paranoid: Why are you asking me? No, why are you asking me? How should I know? Really! And why do you want to know?

Blonde/Sardar(ni)/Drenched: She was in what? You know, the chick… what was the chick in? Without that information, I can’t tell anything.

The Creepy Old Man of KFC (what’s his name?): Chicken? Damn! We missed one?

Amitabh Bachchan/Shah Rukh Khan: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It did it by mistake; B: It was forced to do so; C: It wanted to meet its family standing on the other side of the road; D: It wasn’t a chicken at all.

(K)Ekta Kapoor: Kyunki (k)chicken (k)bhi kabhi (k)egg (k)tha.

Mallika Sherawat: After having lived in such an oppressive environment where it had no rights, the chicken finally broke free and is now exposing itself to the world by crossing the road. It’s not a hypocrite like all others.

Australian Press: Just like the Indian Cricket Team, the Indian chickens are also ill-mannered and rude. [Four pages dedicated to slandering the Indian chickens.]

Elvis Presley: It was walking to the Jailhouse Rock.

Bob Dylan: How many roads must a chicken cross before it can stop being questioned? The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind.

John Lennon: You may say the chicken is a dreamer, but it’s not the only one.

The Beatles: Because it was tired of sitting on a cornflake and waiting for the van to come.

Pink Floyd: On the day the wall came down, the chickens threw the coop locks onto the ground, and with beaks high, they raised a cry, for freedom had arrived.

Led Zeppelin: To reach the stairway to heaven on the other side.

Hilarious! i found this here.

Advertisements

5 Comments

Filed under humour

In Solidarity with the people of Mumbai

The events in Mumbai have left most of us shocked and dismayed over the narrow mindedness and myopia of the perpetrators of these heinous acts. Our hearts and prayers are with our indian brothers and sisters at this time of distress.

Let me say something here, such a sophisticated and meticulously planned onslaught cannot be implemented by any one (irrespective of who or what they may be called) without the aid and or connivance of people in the higher echelons of power.I have not been following this story due to looming submission deadlines, but from what i gather this level of planning is impossible without support from people who know the system.And i am no conspiracy theorist. At this point natural inclination would be to say i am wrong, but only time will tell.

RantingsbyMM has also blogged about this with a link to a petition which can be signed.

Peace!

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

The two drunkards – An Economic analysis.

Seen two druncards high on arrack? they would walk with one hand on the others shoulder and the other hand waving about for balance. They will always stagger but will never fall, but when one falls he pulls the other who is depending on him down as well.

Type the word globaliZation on google and 19,400,000 hits come up, try the word globaliSation 6,290,000 hits come up. There is a very distinct irony in this. Globali-s/z-ation has failed to globalis/ze the very word which manifests its ideals.

Economics is not my area of expertise, but it is something that has always interested and enticed me albeit my relative ignorance on the subject.

An Indian economist M.R.Venkatesh speaks about the global economy and stresses on very pertinent issues, globalisation, the family system, the imminent crash of the dollar and global economic/military domination.

He speaks about how vital the institution of family is for the growth of a nations economy, it may perhaps be the very facet that decides if a nations economy is a savings economy or a consumption economy. I spoke about how the disintegration of the family inevitably results in added and more often unnecessary consumption here .

So much so that he assures the sustenance of the Indian Economy as long as the Institution of Family is deeply rooted in the Indian social fabric, he has a very simple and correct argument, lets not go into economic jargon and avoid serious terms dealing with national fiscal policies. He speaks about how the lady in the house manages the economy at home by protecting the family from over consumption and hence avoiding wastage, therefore the family is secure from the banes of unnecessary expenses and the home economy goes at a steady pace, and the safety of all family economies would result in the direct security of the national economy, simpy by avoiding waste.

The family is so vital to the global economy that it is not spoken about in Economic text books. As he says himself this is not another video bashing America’s fiscal policies, but he claims to want to save america from its own undoings and the banes of globalization.

There is a very simple comprehensive explanation on the current sub-prime and mortgage crisis, and how today’s economy is run by pure speculation as opposed to substance at hand.

He speaks of how the mighty Russia once was and claims that in 1991 people in russia had to wait for 48 hrs to get a loaf of bread, such was its decline, and he predicts the imminent crash of the American might if this economic trend continues.

The title of this post – the two drunkards- refers to The american and chinese economies being inter-dependent. Whilst china is happy to produce domestic goods and sell to america and thereby boost their dollar reserves, the americans are happy to not produce day to day items such as domestic appliances and keep buying them from china, the two economies will stagger and fluctuate when one has its turbulence, but they support each other. But when one economy fails it pulls down the other.

The beauty of the Indian economy is such that it is a savings economy relative to America and a consumption economy relative to China, that is its expenditure is with responsibility and only when necessary.

My seemingly negative rhetoric towards the capitalist ideologies doesnt mean that i am a proponent of socialist thought, i am just an outsider who is unwilling to embrace entirely either one of them, this is not to say btw that neither system has no good.

A very good video to watch, a definite eye opener.

4 Comments

Filed under india

Coy yet Mischievous

school boys

One of my favourite captures.

2 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

Barack Obama the Architect !!??

This is not another percieved “blowing my own trumpet” post 😛 , something i do a lot of google searches is on Architecture, and these days a rather cliched google search is Barack Obama. So dont blame me that i get this odd snippet of wierd information when i had no intention of discovering it in the first place.

Being a politician is a profession, but somehow i see it in a totally different league of a profession than say, a Lawyer, an Engineer or a Medical Doctor, the difference being that you can end up being a politician irrespective of the professional circle you belong to.It is extremely rare to find an established politician take up in his latter life the study of Law,Engineering or Politics, but an established Lawyer,Engineer or Doctor is at generous liberty circumstantially to take to politics whenever he wants.

Amongst the educated circles of Politicians, i have to stress this as there are total dumb asses donning the politicians cloak today, anyway amongst the educated circles of politicians some of them if not most are established in the legal profession, so to keep it short most lawyers take up politics.

What about Architects? well this is rather hard to swallow. but something which i have noticed is that inspite of the negligible amount of Architects who take up politics, the few who take it up have somehow been extremely succesful politicians and well respected statesman.

The moment someone says Thomas Jefferson, someone else would say third president of the US before you have the time to say OBAMA! but what is little known is that he was an extremely successful Architect before he took to politics. See some of his Architecture works here.

Binyamin Netanyahu, the Hawkish former Prime Minister of Israel was an Architect from the University of Jerusalem before he took to Politics, I have no respect for his political ideology whatsoever given his hardline attitude to the palestinian suffering, nevertheless that doesnt negate the fact that he is a charismatic smart leader.

Now Obama,now who would have thought! According to the Daily Telegraph he would have taken to Architecture if he didnt take to politics, wonder what kind of Architect he may have been.

Further more Obama intends to open a basket ball court in the white house grounds, and his favourite Artist is Pablo Picasso. Now the debate opens up, who can do more social good, Politicians or Architects ? After all politicians have in the past commissioned top Architects to make buildings that reflect their strength or intimidate their opponents, and will continue to do so. Just ask Adolf Hitler he’ll tell you.

Leave a comment

Filed under architecture, politics

response to – So you think you’re all artsy fartsy eh??

Well this in response to my previous post where i had quizzed about the visual illusion in the picture. I know it is very hard to find, we didnt realise it until the Architect told us what it was.

Irrespective of whether you are indeed artsy fartsy or not, you’ll may have noticed how railway lines seem to visually converge at a point, this point is called the vanishing point.When we look at anything if we bother to look a little deeper everything vanishes at this point, This is most accurate and apparent when the lines are parrallel to each other, as in the railway lines.

Now coming to the picture, in the picture..The design of the building is such that the lines of columns are not placed on Parrallel lines, but rather in plan, they have been placed on two lines which are slightly imparrallel, i.e if they were to be extended they would converge (physically as well as visually), if they were parrallel they will seem to converge visually but physically two parrallel lines will never meet. Therefore The vanishing point (the perspective) is slightly exaggerated, and therefore it causes a visual illusion i.e THE END OF THE CORRIDOR IS MUCH CLOSER THAN IT LOOKS, THE PERSPECTIVE MAKES IT LOOK AS IF THE END IS VERY FURTHER AWAY.

I know some of you may not understand what i am saying, but these sort of things are best explained using diagrams, couldnt bother sketching and scanning.

Cheers!

Picture taken from here.

3 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

So you think you’re all artsy fartsy eh??

This picture was taken at the Gemäldegalerie in Berlin when i visited it last winter.

The Architect Thomas Albrecht quizzed us asking if we found something unusual in what we saw about this part of the interior, awed by the fact that we were talking to the great architect himself (who spent ten years of his life in this project), we didt find anything odd whatsoever.

Actually there is a visual illusion in this image, and it was pointed out to us by Albrecht.

Anyone out there with astute eyes want to take a guess and see what is wrong in this image?

4 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized